Well, I've been living in Egypt for almost 5 years now. There are things that I've had to get used to that were once strange and unusual, but are now very normal to me. I decided, while chewing on a piece of over cooked pizza and simultaneously making my afternoon cup of coffee, that it was time to write them down.
1. Ketchup as sauce on pizza. When we first moved from Menoufiya to Cairo, we were anticipating some good, American style pizza. We were silly to assume that just because Cairo catered to westerners didn't mean it had pizza to our liking. In Egyptian owned pizzerias it's not common to have juicy, savory tomato sauce under the cheese. In fact, it's dry, and if you ask for extra sauce they throw in a few ketchup packets inside the pizza box. It took me a long time to accept that ketchup is sauce, and pickled carrots, onions, and turnips are the basic side dish to any pizza.
2. Viagra is seafood. On just about any menu, seeing the word "viagra" is normal. "Viagra pizza." "Penne with viagra." Being a typical American woman who grew up with those disturbing yet humorous Viagra commercials, my first thought is the creepy grin of Bob the Viagra guy. It didn't take long to figure out that viagra is the word they use for seafood (shrimp, squid, clams and imitation crab meat).
3. The food comes to you. Yes, you read that right. I'm not talking about take out, I'm talking about milk and fresh produce. Every morning, without fail, the milk man rides around on his bike yelling "Laban." (Milk), nice and loud for everyone to hear, and sometimes "Zibda" (Butter). If you're out of milk, or prefer fresh, straight off the truck, you can look out for "Laban Man". All you have to do is call out to him from your window or balcony, tell him what you want and he pours fresh milk into a plastic bag for you, a kilo for a mere 7 junai. A few days a week you can hear this sound, which sounds like a cow in labor, echoing through the neighborhood and you know the vegetable truck is coming. There's also a garlic truck and orange truck. These farmers drive around, vocally advertising their haul through a mega phone. It's more than just food, actually. If your ambooba (gas tank) runs out, just wait for the rhythmic tinkering drum of the ambooba man to make his round and he'll give you a new one. Have some old stuff you want to get rid of? No problem! The bikkya man comes around several times to take, or even buy, unwanted furniture or household items. It's a homebodies dream.
I'm pretty sure I can go on living without ketchup on pizza, even though I've done it a few times because the pizza was just so dry. And the viagra thing just doesn't phase me anymore. But if I ever had to live anywhere else and no one drove around offering their goods, I'd be pretty bummed out. It's just so convenient, especially with kids. Too tired, or lazy to get everyone dressed to run some errands? Wait. Either you can go out to meet the vendor, or you can send your oldest, in this case, my 9 year old step brother.
4. Send the kids. Okay, this one is last minute, and isn't strictly about food, but this is one thing that you can definitely do here that you might get in trouble for in America (nowadays). Send your kids to the souq (market) for some milk/bread/cucumbers. Honestly, I love this! At breakfast, and sometimes before dinner, you're in the middle of preparing food and, aw shucks, you're out of milk! Oh snap, the cucumbers have gone bad! When no present adult is mentally able to put on their shoes (or hijab) and walk a short distance down the street to the souq, we send the kids. Seriously, greatest thing ever. Give them a little pocket change for a bag of Shibsy (Chipsy - Egyptian Lays) and they're more than happy to do it. Got a bag of trash that needs to go out? Send the kids. Delivery man locked outside the gate? Send the kids. Your friend dropping off something real quick? Pff. Send the kids.
